day 3: favorite tv show…

And here we are at Day 3: favorite TV show.  Once again, I can’t choose just one!  That would be silly!  So we’ll dig right in.  And in no particular order, 10 of my favorite TV shows.

Okay, I kinda lied.  If I absolutely had to pick only ONE favorite show, I wouldn’t even blink before saying Buffy the Vampire Slayer.  Hands down: Best. Show. Ever.  I love it.  It started as a movie (which was awful) that was created by Joss Whedon – who left the movie when they started taking it in a direction he didn’t want to go.  His response was to create the TV show, to make Buffy who and what he wanted it to be.  The rest is TV history.  I could watch this show all day long, and I have!  I own every season, I own books, and posters and action figures and trading cards and much more.  My hubby and I even went as Buffy and Angel for Halloween one year (I was Angel, he was Buffy – I’ll have to post that picture someday)!  It’s brilliant and I love Joss Whedon.

Of course, I also love Angel, the show that spun off of Buffy.  It’s edgier, darker and more grown up.  While Buffy started in High School, then moved on to college and beyond, this show was for a more adult crowd.  Brilliant characters and story line.  Sadly it meet it’s doom before it was time.  Half way through season 5, right after the 100th episode aired the show was canceled and Joss had to find a way to bring resolution to a 4.5 yr story line in 1/2 a season.  He did a good job, but I would have loved to have seen where he would have taken the show next if given the chance.

Yup – another Joss Whedon masterpiece, again dead before it’s time.  Canceled after only a few shows aired, this show has become HUGELY popular in it’s afterlife.  It also has one of the best episode ever – EVER – made for TV called “Out of Gas”.  If you only watch one episode of Firefly, let it be that one.  Brilliant.  The characters are so well developed for only having 14 episodes (and only 12 of those aired on TV).  My dogs are even named after two of the characters in the show: Malcolm (the captain, in this pictures he’s the one sitting down) and Inara (the “companion”, pictured on the far left).  If you haven’t ever watched this show, you have to.  That’s an order 😀

Moving out of my Whedon obsession and into my crime show obsession, we have Dexter.  If you haven’t seen this or even heard of it, it’s because it’s only on Showtime (which I don’t get, we just buy all the DVD’s).  I also own all of the books that this show is based on (well, I still need the 2 most recent…).  Dexter is a blood splatter analyst for the Miami PD – he also happens to be a serial killer.  But he’s a killer with a purpose, he only kills other serial killers.  He has no conscience and so was taught to act human by his foster father (who was a cop) and was also taught how to get away with murder by him.  Even though Dexter lacks real emotion you find your self rooting for him, and not wanting him to get caught, either in a lie or a murder.  It’s a brilliant show based off of some brilliant books.  You can find it on Netflix so give it a shot!

I love CSI.  LOVE IT!  However, I hate the Miami and New York versions!  I’m a purist 😀  The characters are great, and the story lines keep getting more complex and they just suck you in, trying to solve the puzzle.  I’d be shocked if you’ve never even caught a glimpse of this show.  It’s a power house and there are reruns of it everywhere!  I think it’s going into it’s 11 or 12th season?  Whatever it is, I don’t ever want this show to end!

We’ll get back to my love of crime shows, but we’ll take a break to meditate on my love of British TV.  BBC – I love you.  First up we have The IT Crowd.  Brilliant comedy!  Currently there are 3 series (seasons) of this show and I’ve heard they’re working on #4 (YAY)!  It’s about 2 guys who work IT for an office in the city and their manager, a woman who knows nothing about computers.  It laugh out loud during every episode.  Anything that can go wrong does, but in a great funny way, not an Oh God make it end kind of way.  If you need a good laugh you HAVE to watch this show.

If you watch Doctor Who, you can already judge which Doctor and companion are, in my opinion, the best.  I love this show.  I actually grew up watching the old school series on PBS with my dad.  When I didn’t catch an actually episode I could hear it in my bedroom at night when I was supposed to be sleeping, that tell tale music and the sounds of Daleks, the TARDIS and Cybermen!  Brilliant.  I’m now a devoted fan of the new series, and of course Doctor #10 and Rose.  Love her.  I very much enjoy Doctor #11 and Amy Pond, the new regeneration, but David Tenant will always hold a special place in my heart.  If you like SciFi at all, watch Doctor Who!

Last in our British Series is Black Books.  This show only had 2 series, but was absolutely brilliant.  It’s about a cranky book shop owner, his best friend and co-worker.  Bernard Black hates people, hates life, hates everything.  He’s absolutely hilarious.  Dylan Moran has become one of my favorite actors/comedians.  You should look for his stuff on YouTube – brilliant.  He smokes like a chimney and drinks more wine than anyone you’ve ever met combined.  Again, if you need a good laugh, find this one!

Let’s get back to some crime shows!  Psych airs on USA and is amazing.  If you are a child of the 80’s, you will get every single joke in this show!  It’s about a guy named Shawn who has a great talent for noticing detail.  He pretends that he’s psychic and gets hired by the police to consult on cases.  He always solves them light years before the police.  He’s helped by his best friend Gus (brilliant played by Dule Hill).  If you’re thinking this sounds a lot like The Mentalist, be assured the Psych came first, and has even poked fun at the similarities of the two shows in some of it’s episodes!  It makes me laugh out hysterically in every episode.  A must watch.

Last on my list is TNT’s Leverage.  I just started watching this show a few months ago (caught the 1st 2 seasons through Netflix, 3rd season is on now).  It’s about criminals who have banned together to do good.  A grifter, a hitter, a theif, a hacker and the mastermind.  They get hired by every day people who have been wronged (family member murdered, life savings stolen, house taken by sketchy methods).  They figure out who done it and then plan an elaborate scheme to not only right the wrong, but make sure the responsible party pays for what they did.  It’s almost like Ocean’s 11 in that you never have the whole story of what went on until the end.  Keeps you guessing and even laughing at times.  And it doesn’t hurt that Christian Kane (who played Lindsey in Angel) is in it, too!  I recommend it.

That’s it for TV shows!  Of course I thought of tons more as I was writing this (how could I leave out 24 and Star Trek: TNG??), but I’ll spare you the rest 🙂  Next up: Favorite book(s).  I’m an AVID reader, so be prepared! 😀


day 2: favorite movie…

Welcome to Day 2 – movie day.  You thought I loved music (well I do…) – I LOVE MOVIES!!!  Ask my poor dear husband who has to suffer through me watching movies over and over again, or constantly speaking to him in movie quotes.  He’s not one to watch a movie more than once.  Me?  If I like it, I own it and I watch it continually!  So, you could probably already guess, I have many, many favorites.  So, I’m going to have to cut this post down and just choose a few (and by few I mean 8).  So again, in no particular order, some of my favorite movies:

Basically this movie is about a bank robbery.  It’s a Spike Lee film, so you know there’s more going on than that!  It’s amazingly put together (and doesn’t hurt that it stars Clive Owen *drool*) and keeps you guessing.  I’m not giving any more plot away because really, it would ruin the movie.  Watch it if you haven’t!

This movie cracks me up.  It brings back memories of my time working at camp.  There is a quote from this movie for EVERY situation in life and if you can’t find one, you’re not trying hard enough!  Tommy inherits an auto parts factory after the unexpected death of his father and has to go on the road to sell the new line of break pads – hilarity ensues!  Check it out!

One word: epic.  The movies are as beautifully crafted as the books!  Read the books!  Watch the movies and show some love for JRR Tolkien!  He wrote the books because he was a linguist and wanted to invent a language – but the story has lived on and on!

Joss Whedon is my master.  He has created the majority of my favorite TV shows, and doesn’t disappoint with Serenity, created to tie up the story line that was prematurely ended when Firefly was canceled 1/2 way through it’s first season.  The characters are rich and have more depth than the next 10 movies you’ll watch combined!  Not to mention they all kick some major ass!  If you like SciFi, you’ll love this – and watch the Firefly TV series first.  You won’t regret it!

While this movie is one of my favorites (again, Clive Owen), I haven’t been able to watch it in over 3 yrs.  It’s based on the short story by PD James (also one of my favorite books).  The premise is it’s the year 2027 and for the past 18 years no children have been born anywhere in the world – all humans have become infertile.  You can see why I may have a hard time watching this movie.  It’s an amazing story and really does give hope in the IF world, but hard to watch.  If you think you can handle the story line, give it a try.  I think it has a lot to say not only about fertility, but about the state of our world in general and where we could end up if just one thing were to change.

On the lighter side we have Kevin Smith’s brilliant Dogma.  HIGHLY irreverent but incredibly hilarious.  The basic premise is that there are 2 angels who had been tossed out of heaven eons ago and they’ve found a loop hole back in.  The problem is if they complete their plan existence will cease to be.  On top of all of this, God has gone missing and the only ones who can find him/her are a woman who works at an abortion clinic and 2 slackers from Jersey.  Yeah, I said it was irreverent!  Within all that though, it makes some great points on the state of faith and belief.  If you’re not easily offended give this one a shot!

And if you’re in for even MORE irreverence and lots of violence then Boondock Saints is for you!  It’s about 2 Irish twin brothers living in Boston who one night dream they have been called by God to rid the world of evil doers.  So they go on a killing spree.  Yup – violence.  It’s also incredibly funny (gotta love the gay FBI agent played by Willem Defoe) and even within the violence and terrible theology carried out by these 2 brothers you can find some meaning.  Warnings again to those easily offended and those who don’t appreciate blood and violence in a movie – if you can stand all that though, you must watch this movie.

And last but certainly not least, The Big Lebowski.  I think this is the only Cohen Brothers movie that I like.  The rest of them are just too far off of making any sense for me.  I like a good confusing movie, don’t get me wrong, but pointless and confusing gets a bit much (though I know that’s their thing, it’s just not for me).  But in the case of the Big Lebowski, it’s beautiful!  An unemployed slacker who’s passion in life is bowling and White Russians goes on a quest to replace the rug from his front room that was peed on by 2 thugs looking for a different Jeff Lebowski.  The Dude (Jeff Bridges) embarks on the quest only to be side tracked by kidnappings, nihilists, Vietnam vets (his best friend) and eccentric artists.  It’s a crazy good time.  Highly recommended!

Okay, well, that’s my pick of 8 favorite movies.  I have more, but I’ll spare you all of that!  I feel this is a fair representation of what I like 😀  Stay tuned tomorrow for Day 3: TV programs (oy vey, I’m sorry, you’re gonna get another long one!)

day 1: favorite song…

So, we begin!  Day 1 of my 30 day blog journal.  The theme for today is my favorite song.  What?  I have to choose ONE favorite song??  Not happening!  I don’t think I can even pick less than 10!  I have a lot.  Pretty much if you want to know my favorite songs, come over and look at my iTunes list!  There are thousands of them listed there.  I love music, and I always have.  I’m very much into Classic Rock the most, but have recently discovered some newer bands that I like too, though they are not the “main stream” bands.  I really do not like the popular music of today.  The radio stations I listen to play oldies, classic rock and stuff from my childhood (80’s & 90’s).  So, I’ll try not to over whelm you too much, but I’ll give you a sampling of some of my favs (in no particular order).

My favorite all time band is The Beatles.  I of course have many other favorites, but if I was forced to pick one favorite there, it’d be the Beatles, so I’ll start with them.  Pretty much, I love all of there stuff.  There are a few I don’t like (mostly Paul McCartney songs – seriously, can he write a song with more than 10 words in it?  I don’t think so…).  I don’t think I could pick one favorite from their whole catalog, so I’m just picking a random one that rocks.  It’s “Happiness is a Warm Gun”:


Next on the list is from a newer “band” that I absolutely love.  The “band” is Iron & Wine.  Why is “band” in quotes?  Well, because it’s actually just one guy named Sam Beam – he plays all the instruments and sings all of the harmonies on the albums he makes.  He’s amazing (not to mention that I really go for long hair and beards…check out my husband)!  I’m actually going to put up 2 of his songs here.  The first is Resurrection Fern.  The second is Such Great Heights (originally written by The Postal Service).  Such Great Heights was on the Garden State soundtrack, so if you’ve seen that movie, you’ve heard this song.  It was also featured in an M&M’s commercial a couple of years ago.



Back to some classic rock, we have Pink Floyd’s masterpiece Wish You Were Here.  The first time I heard this song was while I was working at camp in 2000.  A group of campers from the older kids group borrowed guitars from the counselors and played this song at the talent show on Thursday.  It was great and I went and tracked it down after that.


And of course, I can’t leave out Led Zeppelin.  I love them.  I got to see Robert Plant and Allison Krauss play last year (they had an amazing album come out a couple years ago).  I don’t even know which of their songs would be my favorite, so I’ll just pick a random one – Immigrant Song.


This next song is by Stuart Davis – he’s an artist from Minnesota (my homeland…) who does amazing things with a guitar.  I love him and all of his songs.  I couldn’t find my favorite song of his on YouTube (called Your House) so I just picked one that I also like a lot called Mermaid (warning, it gets a bit graphic – and funny!)  Enjoy.


I had some more I was going to list, but I think I’ll stop there as it’s getting long!  I hope you enjoy and maybe even find some new music you didn’t know before!  Up tomorrow: Favorite Movie (again, will probably be a long one)!

30 day blog journal…

So, this seems to be going around the IF blogging circles.  I decided to jump on the fun train!  I always have a hard time picking just 1 favorite, so there will be multiple favorites for each one.  I’m doing this as a way to keep my self blogging in the down times between my appointments.  My next appointment is Aug 5th and I’m really hoping things are still going well – so this is a distraction for myself as well as a way to keep the blog going.  Below is the list of the 30 day blog journals I’ll be doing.  Hope you all enjoy getting to know me better!  (Thanks go to A Nuttier Life for the list)

Here’s a preview of what you will be learning about me over the next 30 days…

30 day blog journal…

Day 1-your favorite song
Day 2-your favorite movie
Day 3-your favorite television program
Day 4- your favorite book
Day 5-your favorite quote
Day 6- 20 of my favorite things
Day 7-a photo that makes you happy
Day 8-a photo that makes you angry/sad
Day 9-a photo you took
Day 10-a photo taken over 10 years ago of you
Day 11-a photo of you recently
Day 12-something you are OCD about
Day 13-a fictional book
Day 14-a non-fictional book
Day 15-your dream house
Day 16-a song that makes you cry (or nearly)
Day 17-an art piece (drawing,sculpture, painting, etc)
Day 18-my wedding/future wedding/past wedding
Day 19-a talent of yours
Day 20-a hobby of yours
Day 21-a recipe
Day 22-a website
Day 23-a youtube video
Day 24-where I live
Day 25-your day, in great detail
Day 26-your week, in great detail
Day 27-my worst habit
Day 28-whats in my handbag/purse
Day 29-hopes,dreams and plans for the next 365 days
Day 30- a dream for the future

a wonderful opportunity…

So the fertility clinic that I used to go to Fertility Centers of Illinois is offering a WONDERFUL opportunity to someone in Illinois who is struggling with infertility and looking at IVF – a free cycle!!  I wish I would have known of this while I was there, but it’s all good now.

Anyway, they are having a golf fundraiser to raise money to help couples afford IVF.  You can apply to receive this amazing gift – simply click here to be taken to the fundraiser’s web page, and then click on the application link.  That simple!  I hope this reaches someone in Illinois that this could really help to reach our ultimate goal: a baby in our arms.  Good Luck!

five years ago today…

Five years ago today, my life changed – and all for the better.  On July 16, 2005 I married my wonderful and amazing husband, Justin.  We’ve had a rough time the last 3.5 yrs, but it has only made us stronger together and made me love him more.  He is sensitive and caring and always there for me when I need him.  I only hope I am the same for him.  We have a long road ahead of us, but I can only hope that come February we will have one more reason to celebrate together and fall in love all over again.  I love you Justin, and I can’t imagine my life with out you!

We did our pictures before the wedding, so this is shortly after we saw each other for the first time that day, all dolled up.  We got a bunch of great shots of the actual moment, where we twirled each other around, but I won’t bore you with those 😀  Doesn’t my man look amazing in a kilt??

We got married at the camp I had grown up next to, gone to as a camper and worked at my whole life.  It is a beautiful location and I was so happy to have my special day there.  Of course, it was the middle of July in Minnesota, so it was 98 degrees outside with about 80% humidity!!  Don’t believe Minnesota gets hot??  Come on up in the summer time!

My amazing bridesmaids: Best Friend Susie, my College Roommate Kiersten and my Niece Nicole.  They were all great!  The dresses we picked out didn’t come in junior sizes so I had my friend Kate recreate the dresses in a smaller size for Nicole – and it turned out beautiful!  Kate also made the flower girl dress and of course, my dress!

The groomsmen: Justin’s brother Josh, his Friend Chris, and my Friend Josh.  They were all good sports and agreed to wear kilts as well.  There was a lot of sexy man leg around!  Not only all the groomsmen and the groom, but both of our pastors wore a kilt and a number of our guests wore either kilts or man skirts.  It was great!

Justin’s family and my amazing In-Laws!  Brenda has been the best mother-in-law and is always supportive of both Justin and I.  Josh and I can talk in movie quotes all day long.  Since the wedding the family has grown to include Josh’s wife Jenn and their 2 kids Logan and Bella.

My family:  Dad-Nevin, Mom-Debby, Me, Sister-Robbin, Sister-Shannon, Bro-in-Law John, and niece Nicole.  Since then we’ve also added my niece Hannah!

One of the best shots of the whole wedding!  Sadly, my friend Kiersten got cut out mostly.  It was a lot of fun to do these shots though, and this is the one that turned out the best.  Look at those Twinkle Toes!! 😀

Our Ring Bearer Glen and Flower Girl Sophie – aren’t they just adorable!  There was a downhill slope to where the wedding was, and they ran the whole way down!  I was so afraid they were going to fall and do summer salts down the hill, but they made it!  Glen was great with little Sophie and held her hand the whole way so she would go to the right spot.

Justin and I walked in down the aisle together.  I never liked how people only stand up for the Bride – it was Justin’s day too and I wanted people to acknowledge that.  Of course, I think we just ended up confusing them and NO ONE stood up for us!  I guess I should have had the pastors instruct everyone to stand when we came in!  There were 2 aisle down to the front, then we met in the middle and continued the rest of the way together.  I loved it.

Our pastors Bob & Tripp.  Bob was my boss/pastor at the organization I worked at when I was in Lutheran Volunteer Corps and is a ELCA Lutheran Pastor.  Tripp is a wonderful friend of both Justin and I and had just gotten ordained into the ABC/USA (American Baptist) right before our wedding – this covered both Justin & I 😀  We also had Justin’s cousin, Andy, a Missouri Synod Lutheran pastor do our blessing.  I think we’re covered on most fronts (we know a lot of pastors)!  They all had stoles made out of the same material as Justin’s kilt.

My parents, checking to see if the pulled pork is ready to go for the reception!  Since the camp where we got married is literally right next door to my parents house, we had the reception there in the brand new shed my dad had just finished building that summer.  Really – I helped him put in the last bit of concrete 2 days before the wedding!

Our cake.  My sister Shannon and her husband John made and decorated it.  It was very pretty and fit in so well with everything else!  Also…yummy sheet cakes to go with it.  We of course, forgot to actually do the cake cutting at the reception (come on, it was hot, I just got married…you expect me to remember something like that).  We saved the top and froze it to eat on our first anniversary – yeah, I think it’s still in my parents freezer in the basement…

The reception was perfect, exactly what we wanted!  Low key, cheap and fun!  It was “catered” by a friend of my families.  By that I mean, Buster made all the food and dropped it off, but it was a serve yourself kind of thing!  It was great to have all of our friends and family together all at once, and to see different groups of friends come together for the first time.

Our first dance.  It was supposed to be to Norah Jones – Come Away With Me (the lyrics were perfect for the long distance relationship we had for 2 yrs), but I couldn’t find my CD and the DJ forgot to bring the song.  So it ended up being to Alison Krauss – When You Say Nothing at All (which was also perfect).  In the background you can see our keg.  Nothing but the best for our wedding! 😀

It was the perfect day with my perfect man.  I’m glad I have the pictures to help remind me (do any of YOU remember your wedding day exactly?).  Even though we’ve had heart break and tragedy, we’ve had each other.  We’ve journeyed together down this Long and Winding Road, and I’m looking forward to another 50-55 yrs more!

and now, the rest of the story…

Before I tell the whole doctor’s appointment fiasco story, I just want to brag a bit – I got my first round of morning sickness today!!!  I know, not something you normally want to brag about, but I’ve never had it before.  I thought maybe I never would – maybe I just needed to get further on in pregnancy to have it.  It makes me feel awful, but on the other hand, it makes me happy, because maybe – just maybe it means I’m going to make it 😀

Woke up about 4 am and the whole world was spinning!  I’ve never been so dizzy in my life!  I tried to lay still on my back for a bit and it calmed down a little, so I went to turn on my side – bad idea jeans.  I sat up and hubby asked if I was okay.  I said “I think I am going to throw up”  he said, “I’ll go get the bucket.”  Good man.  I then had him walk me to the bathroom (so I wouldn’t fall over) because of course, I had to pee again.  Took the bucket with me.  Once I felt a bit better he walked me back to bed and I spent the rest of the night lying still on my back, trying to sleep when I could.  By morning the dizziness was less and my tummy felt better.

I wanted to stay home, but knew I needed to go to work, because I already missed most of Monday, and I’m taking 1/2 of Friday and all of next Monday off to go up to Minnesota to see my first Twins game at the new Target Field!!!  So, I had hubby drive me in to work.  It wasn’t the best ride, got nauseous again, but I was pretty okay until we turned off Lake Shore Drive and onto a very bumpy, pot hole filled street.  Then, I made him pull over and grab a bucket from the trunk.  He got me to work and I ran in to the bathroom while he went to the store to get me snacks and lunch.

I haven’t actually thrown up yet, but it’s been very very close.  I’m keeping my bucket by my desk all day, and trying not to make sudden movements, as I’m still pretty dizzy.

So that’s my sickness story…on to my doctor visit (this is going to be a long post – sorry.  Maybe a nice little picture will help break up the longness of the post!)

Here is my little one at 9 weeks!!  I’ll get into the story of the ultrasound in a bit here.

So my first prenatal appointment with my ob/gyn was this Monday.  My appointment was at 11:45, so I left work at 11 and go there a bit early.  Luckily they got me in pretty quick.  Sat through the long family & medical history questions from the nurse.  I noticed that the u/s machine was not in the room so I asked if Dr. D was going to do one, since I have a clot next to the baby in my uterus.  The nurse said, in that case yes, she probably would want to do an ultrasound.  So she had me dress in the lovely, very flattering hospital gown and cover in a sheet.  An actual sheet, not a paper one!  My MFM has real sheets too – and they’re huge!  I never felt covered when I had to use the paper ones!

Anyway, Dr. D comes in and tells me that their u/s machine broke the other day and she wouldn’t be able to do an u/s.  My heart dropped.  I’d been anticipating this appointment to make sure my baby was still okay and the little heart was beating away.  She said there was another office in the building that did u/s and she would try to squeeze me in there, but it may not be the same day.  I told her to try anyway.

Then, I had to go through more med. history questions with her, have a breast exam and a pelvic exam (complete with speculum, yay…).  She said all looked good and that my cervix was closed, a good sign.  I was happy about that.  I also asked her about some pain I’d been having on the left side, sort of a sharp, crampy feeling I get sometimes, but only on the left.  She said that was okay, because it’s where the cyst was (what cyst?  Do I have that too, or is that the clot?  Of course, I didn’t ask because I think of these things later…) and the pain was actually good, because it means it’s doing what it’s supposed to do.  During my exam she pressed around and found the exact spot where it was.  OUCH!  So I ask a bunch more questions, get refill RX’s for progesterone (to get me to week 10 when the placenta takes over) and Metformin (to get me to the 2nd Trimester, when I will stop that).

She then leaves to try and get an u/s appointment for me and to get the blood work form for me I’ll need to do for them.  I was lucky that day, because she said they could get me in at 2 pm.  I took it immediately (keep in mind, I left at 11, so I hadn’t had lunch yet).  I also get my blood work form, and 3 pick requisition forms for the office with the u/s machine.  The first is for the u/s appointment that day, the 2nd is to see their MFM doctor (I’m switching insurance in September and the new one doesn’t cover my lovely MFM doc, which makes me very sad), and the 3rd is for 12 week screening.

So, I have to head downstairs (the ob is in a huge medical building, attached to a hospital) to reception and “check in” to go to the Antenatal Office for the u/s.  I literally checked in as an outpatient – had to wear a hospital bracelet and everything!  Very strange.  They tell me I can go up to the office right away, even though my appointment isn’t for another hour.  I head up, check in and they bring me back about 15 min later – early again!

So, time for the ultrasound.  You can guess, I’m terribly nervous at this point.  I’ve never made it to a 2nd ultrasound.  I knew I should be 9 weeks, and I’ve never made it that far either.  To my surprise I didn’t have to do the transvaginal u/s with Wandy!  It was on top of my tummy, yay!  Of course, you have to have a full bladder for that, and they push REALLY hard, so it was uncomfortable, but at least on the outside instead of inside.  My tech was super nice, and actually knew my old MFM because he used to work in there office.  Her name was Mary.

She fires up the machine and starts the u/s.  I’m holding my breath the whole time.  Usually, if they don’t say something soon after it starts, I know it’s bad news.  She waited about 20 seconds, which were the longest of my life – then turned the screen:

Mary: You see the fluttering little heart?

Me: There is still a heartbeat?

Mary: Yes there is!

Me:  *starts to cry and sniffle*

She immediately grabbed the tissue box and handed me one and held my hand.  I told her I’ve never gotten this far before.  I was pretty much bawling at this point.  It was so wonderful and beautiful.  Next she told me we could try to hear the heartbeat, though it’d be just a short 2 seconds so to listen close.  She cranked up the volume and there it was.  2 perfect, beautiful little beats.  The tears started up again, as I had never heard my baby’s heartbeat before.  She told me it was a great 171 bpm.  She did some more measurements and checked on the clot and then it was over.  She printed me some pictures, too 😀  I asked about the clot and she said based on the notes from my old MFM doc, it looked to be about the same size.  I was a bit upset about that, as I’ve lost so much old blood over the past 3 weeks, I was so hopeful it would be gone, or at least smaller!  I’d even stopped spotting over the past week!  No luck though.

So, I get all the goopy gel off (well, as much as I could anyway) and then ask her where I go to make the appointment for my 2nd pink slip of paper.  She looked at it and wasn’t sure what it was for.  She told me to stay in the room and she’d figure it out for me.  Seriously, this place was great!  She came back about 5 min later and said it was for a consult with the MFM about my blood tests and that if I wanted the MFM doc could see me in a few minutes.  I figured, might as well get it done since I was there.

So, about 15 min in the waiting room and they called me back.  I sat with the MFM nurse for a few minutes (she was super nice, too and we had a lot of personal conversation as well as medical) and answered some questions.  She told me to wait a bit and the MFM would be ready for me.  She offered me some juice while I waited which I jumped on because I was starving.  Finally get in to see the doctor and it was really just a rehashing of what I already knew.  She just explained what the MTHFR diagnosis meant and why I had been put on the extra folic acid and baby aspirin.  It seemed kind of silly that I had to meet with her since I already knew all the info, but it was nice to meet here, as I’m sure I’ll be seeing her again.

Next, I went and made my appointment for the 1st Trimester screening (no amnio, I don’t want to do that at all, but we’ll do the u/s and bloodwork).  So I go back to there office on Aug 5th.  I’ll be about 12.5 wks by then.  Glad I don’t have to wait until my next ob appointment to see the baby again (which is Aug 16th).

Finally, I went back up the elevator to finally do the blood work for my ob.  I got into my car at 3pm and was back to the office around 3:30 pm.  I felt so bad that I’d been gone so long.  Luckily I had sent a text to my husband and had him call my boss to tell him I was running late at the doctor.

So, that’s my very very very long story.  If you’ve made it through to the end, I commend you and would give you a medal if I could!  Honestly though, thank you to all of you who have supported me and given me advice through this whole adventure of TTC.  I’m not at the end yet, but after Monday, I’m feeling more and more confident that this could happen, I could be holding my baby come February 14th!!!

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