So, when my doctor told me I had PCOS, I really had no clue what that meant.  In all reality, I still don’t really know what that means.  And also, the diagnosis I feel was kind of a default one – they couldn’t find any other reason why I wasen’t getting pregnant, so I think they just chose that one.  I’m not saying I don’t have PCOS – from what I’ve read about it, it makes sense.  What I am saying is, I kinda feel like the doctor labeled me with this without any proof or testing for it.

That’s not the point though – I wanted to share what I’ve found out about PCOS, mostly from WebMD – the default source of medical info for those who don’t know anything!  If you’d like to read the whole article where I got my information, it can be found here.

PCOS stands for Polycystic ovary syndrome.  From what I can figure, PCOS basically means that my hormones don’t work the way they are supposed to.  I don’t produce the right amounts of hormones essential not just for making babies, but for having regular cycles and ovulating.  This is why I was given certain hormone shots during my IUI cycle, given a shot to make me ovulate, and then given progesterone suppliments to guard against miscarriage.

Symptoms of PCOS are (according to webmd):

  • Acne.
  • Weight gain and trouble losing weight.
  • Extra hair on the face and body. Often women get thicker and darker facial hair and more hair on the chest, belly, and back.
  • Thinning hair on the scalp.
  • Irregular periods. Often women with PCOS have fewer than nine periods a year. Some women have no periods. Others have very heavy bleeding.
  • Fertility problems. Many women with PCOS have trouble getting pregnant (infertility).
  • Depression

I’ve always had acne and weight problems.  My periods have also always been irregular.  I didn’t start my period until about was about 16 or 17 years old.  Since then, they come and go as they please.  I used to have very short periods – sometimes as little as 2 or 3 days, but never more than 5.  Over the past 4 or 5 years, they have pretty much settled into a rhythm of occuring every 3 months and lasting about 6 days.  However, there have been times where I would bleed for over a month.  I didn’t go to a gynocologist until about 3 years ago, and then decided to try to have a baby 1 year after that.  I was never on birth control.

Looking back on the history of my cycles, I should have known something was wrong and done something about it long ago.  I always had a fear in my heart, the “what if I can’t have kids?”  But I never took that thought seriously, until it actually happened.

So here I am now.  Waiting.  Waiting for that period to come, that I’ve always dreaded because of the cramping and the inconvienience.  I was always so happy that my periods were short and few.  I now no that’s not a good thing.  And even when this one does start, I’ll have to wait for the next one before we can try again.  Frustration is a word I understand well.

6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. twoofakindworkingonafullhouse
    Apr 27, 2009 @ 21:42:04

    My story sounds so similar to yours. I was diagnosed in November with PCOS but the interesting thing is today I had my first RE appointment after TTC for 20 months. I was seen by an attending RE and and RE and NEITHER think I have PCOS. I always thought I was diagnosed by default. I have minimal hair on my belly (RE says he thinks in an ethnicity thing) I’m over weight and I have irregular periods. I have always had irregular periods. The RE ordered much more detailed tests to see if I have PCOS. I suggest you ask your gyno for at least an ultrasound to look for the “string of pearls” / cysts. The RE’s were shocked that I never had this done. They truly don’t think there is enough evidence to say I have PCOS.


  2. Carly
    Apr 30, 2009 @ 01:01:15

    Be gentle with yourself. Infertility isn’t real for us…until it is the only thing you think about. We never assume we will live with it…until it is all consuming. Don’t blame yourself for what could have or should have been done. None of this…NONE of it is your fault. It is enormous and beyond our comprehension even when we are in the middle of it. And none of it is your doing. You are incredibly strong and I am in awe of your bravery to share this. I hold you in my prayers.


    • Carly
      Apr 30, 2009 @ 01:05:09

      I just want to clarify that my recent posting was in response to your comment about “should have done something about it long ago”…just in case that wasn’t clear. (I should always read 3 or 4 times before posting….)


  3. meggomae
    Apr 30, 2009 @ 15:05:03

    Carly…thank you so much for your support and your comments. I know it’s dumb to beat myself up over things I can’t control, but there you go – it happens anyway!


    • Carly
      May 01, 2009 @ 00:30:00

      That it does. We always do that, don’t we. Even when we know better. That is why you have friends around to echo more loudly the “good” stuff than our minds can hold onto the bad.
      You are loved.


  4. Kate
    May 12, 2009 @ 02:08:22

    I agree with your feelings here. I have PCOS as well. Did they put you on Metformin? I asked for Clomid but my doc wants me to stick w/ Metformin. I did get pregnant once I was on it, but ofcourse I miscarried.


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